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Saturday, August 20, 2011

Zombie Messenger Infects Me With Weirdness --True Story

Today was a rough day.  Started around the early morning when I was still asleep.  My belly was aching terribly throughout the night.  I was really worried, because I need a good night's sleep before my long double-shift work day.  But the aches never abated.  Something ominous was going to happen, I felt.

I woke every hour or so.  But then, an odd thing happened around four in the morning.  The doorbell rang.  I bolted up.  I figured someone was in trouble.  I was feeling a little ill, but I had enough power over my faculties that I could at least decide that a ring at the doorbell could be the occasion of an emergency.  So I went to the front door and peeped out of the spy hole.  It was a little kid; a neighbor, actually.  I was puzzled.  Again, it was Four AM

I opened the door, and asked him if everything was okay.  I tried to get some sense out of the boy, but he wasn't talking.  Instead, he babbled strange syllables and what not.  His body gyrated and his eyes focused on nothing.  Truly worried, I needed to get to the bottom of why the boy was out at this time of night ringing my bell.  But I could not get any answer from him, no matter what I said to him.  I had to sit down; my body felt weird.  I hoped he'd sit down with me--I could not focus.  I could not act.  Was this even a boy?  Was this real?  Something was happening with my insides.  I was paralyzed right then and there, with a strange boy who couldn't speak wobbling some sort of a voodoo dance right next to me.  As if the kid had infected me with some sort of zombie virus. 

I had no choice...I had to get out of the paralysis.  I needed to get somewhere I could control myself.  I had to get to the bathroom quick.  I shouted to the boy: "Stay here," and told the wife to stay near him.  I got halfway to the bathroom, and I went blind, my eyes rolling every which way into the back of my head.  Sweat poured out of my pores at a high volume--not even on a hot day of 114 degrees has so much sweat exited my body all at once.  Losing balance.  Could not stand straight.  I was so cold.  Ten seconds, and I'd collapse.  What was happening to me?  My torso gyrated in a counter clockwise rotation.  I sat on the toilet.  And then...I wretched from both ends. 




Ultimately, we believe the cause of this strange sickness over me to be food poisoning from yesterday's pot roast.  Yet, what of the boy?  The wife saw him through the window.  Yet when she got to the door, he was gone.  Where did he go?  Was he real?  Did we both see a spectre?

We saw him outside later on in the afternoon.  It's been a rough day.  My body needed rest.  I took comfort knowing the neighbor boy was still alive and acting normal again.  We concluded he was sleepwalking. 

Still, it was an eerie situation that I'll never forget.  Threw off my whole weekend.  I'm over the wretching now, thank the Lord.  But psychological damage has been done.   

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